Resi Stiegler, the Warrior Princess

Here's another piece I recently wrote for my friends at Late Sunday Afternoon...

If you live your life – I mean really LIVE your life – it’s the people and the places and the moments all woven together that make it beautiful. A lot like one of Late Sunday Afternoon’s
beautiful creations. That’s the way I choose to live my life, anyway. Vibrant. Curious. Colorful. Well-traveled. Intertwined and entangled with humans and their stories. Stories like this one. Enjoy.

Almost one year ago to the day, Late Sunday Afternoon Founder Matthew Schildkret sent me a message on Instagram introducing the idea of gifting a Late Sunday Afternoon scarf to powerful women with whom I encountered on my travels. I obliged, of course. It’s been fun. The only challenge is that there are so many incredible women. And that’s where the one and only Resi Stiegler comes into the story. Behold, Resi: the warrior princess.

Resi crushes at the Aspen Winternational in November 2015.

I knew Resi Stiegler – a longtime member of the U.S. Ski Team – before I met her. I mean, not really…but I felt like I did. Why? Her spirit is among the largest I’ve encountered. She’s magnetic. Nicknamed “La Tigre,” early in her career Resi would wear tiger ears on her helmet when she skied. Close with teammate Sarah Schleper, who roars out of the start gate, these women inspired me. I grew up as a ski racer with them as my heroines. They were the warriors of my sport, after all.

I admired Resi’s fight through injury after injury and comeback after comeback, her free spirit floating between the Tetons in Jackson, Wyoming to the beaches of Maui and over to Europe and back again. So when I started working with the team last year, I was stoked to be working with Resi, who had not made criteria for the team in 2015 so was not officially on the U.S. Ski Team. Truthfully, when I met her, I was a little uncertain – two big personalities with big hearts…I wasn’t sure how it was going to play out.

I find it important to acknowledge what I’ve learned from the people whom I’ve been blessed to cross paths with in life. Each of these individuals has influenced the woman I am and are woven into the fabric of my soul, as are the threads woven into the scarf around my neck. Resi has taught me a lesson in being comfortable in who you are. True to yourself and honest with everyone in your path. And feeling deeply and loving big. In a world that sometimes just scratches the surface, Resi has depth. She’s real. She’s human. She’s a friend that’s just easy,and she accepts me for who I am. We laugh, a lot.

Not only does she love skiing, but Resi loves life. And she lives it big and with her whole heart. In fact, she acknowledges life’s magic. She’s an example for everyone around her in enjoying the moment and finding joy in the small things in life…like the way the light hits the patio at Paia Bay Coffee on a subtly rainy-sunny afternoon in Maui. She is light. And her light is bright and sparkly.

Resi the warrior princess has made her Late Sunday afternoon treasure her travel companion, jetting with it across the globe on those travels from Jackson to Maui to Euroland and back. Vibrant. Curious. Colorful. Well-traveled. Intertwined and entangled with humans and their stories. Connected. We are all connected, and there’s always a lesson to be learned from those in our tribe. Open your heart and mind to it and you’ll receive gifts you’ve never imagined. Mahalo, from Maui…where the Aloha spirit is big and bright and sparkly – undoubtedly a source of energy for Resi’s big and bright and sparkly soul.

#AgeOfJesus Wisdom

Have you ever walked up to an Emmy award-winning actor who deals drugs on a TV show that you know absolutely nothing about, and requested crystal meth while dressed as a scantily-clad version of Tinkerbell in a black bustier and forest nymph wings with drag queen-esque make-up at a Neverland/Lost Boys-themed birthday party? Don't do it. I learned that lesson last weekend at my "Age of Jesus" (ahem, 33) birthday party at O.P. Rockwell on Saturday night when someone apparently named "Aaron Paul" (you might know him) and his crew came into the bar and lounged in the velvet couches in the corner. He gave me the look of death and said, "What did you just say? Did you really just ask me for meth? Why do you think I would do meth?!" Oops. I followed it up with, "Are you guys here for a birthday party?!" with a big smile...when I really wanted to say, "The only reason you're here is because it's my birthday party, punk!" (it's off-season in Park City and good ol' Scott Thompson is my bud). Kindness wins. I'm the idiot for asking him for meth (which, by the way, I didn't really want and never have done...just say "NO" to drugs - thank you, D.A.R.E.).

One of the best things about life on this earth is that we are constantly able to learn and grow. It's the best gift the Universe could give us. For instance: if you see him in the bar, don't go up to Aaron Paul and ask him for Crystal Meth. That's one of those lessons. In my time on this planet, I've learned a few more, which I shared last year at this time. Since I shared those lessons, I've started to compile a list of "things that make me unlikely to trust you" which include the following:

1. Bluetooth headsets
2. Neck pillows on planes
3. Mountain Dew-drinking (especially in the morning)
4. Opting for AC vs. windows down on roadtrips
5. Aversion to short-haired chicks
6. Kid leashes
7. A man who doesn't oblige when I ask him if I can cup his beard
8. Anyone who doesn't smile when they see what I wrote on the back of my credit card ("ID Me, FOOL")
9. Men who wear foundation when they're hungover and trying to hide it
10. Vegans (except for Chelsea)
11. Men who have weak stomachs...I have specifics, but I'm trying to be PC here - sort of.

Also, and a bit more seriously, I'll add to my list an important lesson I've learned in a poignant manner in the last 12 months. Don't waste time with people who don't want to spend their time with you. You deserve to be appreciated and loved like the special human that you are. Add to that: true, pure love is not suffocating...it's the most freeing feeling you'll ever experience.

What does Jesus have to do with it?! Well, he was apparently 33 when he died. To me, I think 33 makes me think a bit more...spend less time on the things that don't matter...the people that don't matter. But it also makes you more grateful and loving and sensitive to the things that do matter. That's pretty special.

What was with the the Neverland/Lost Boys Theme? We're all searching...some of us with more intention than others. We're all on a journey and some of us are more lost than others. However, we're all trying to navigate and find our way in this beautiful mess called life. That's what unites us, and that's cool. One day at a time. One foot in front of the other. Baby steps. Patience. I'm learning, but I'm moving slowly. When I have a rough day or an off interaction, I remind myself that we're all doing the best we can with the tools we have. That helps me to find empathy in most situations.

So, even though I think Aaron Paul should carry around blue rock candy in his pocket with a water gun, I'll be empathetic because I can imagine how annoying it is for fans to come up and ask for crystal meth. Especially when they don't even watch TV. Or actually know who he is in the first place. And they're wearing forest nymph wings and drag queen-esque make-up.

Always learning, always growing...even if it's in Neverland,

Megan

Seattle in 24 Hours via Serendipity

You might be wondering why I traveled to Seattle for 24 hours a couple of weeks ago. A collaborative effort with the talented Gina Marie, we stood in front of a panel of 13 fashion industry people and painted a picture that what a little (but not quite) something along the lines of...

"Allow me to give you some context for the reason I stand before you...I met Gina Moorhead via a serendipitous series of events that all began with 1,000 condoms in my face (a dress fashioned out of 1,000 condoms at a Planned Parenthood event in Minneapolis), which led to an Ethnotek trunk show at Cliche and a coffee at Urban Bean with an invite to the Tribe and eventually blossomed into a business relationship over a burrito bowl after bikram yoga. On a hot day. Like 100 degrees, after 100 yogis in 100 degrees together. Sweaty. And delicious. And serendipitous.

What initially drew me to Gina was her innate passion for creating beautiful things with meaning. After all, what you wear says something about you. What connected us was our shared curiosities. We are travelers...magic seekers...explorers who travel with intention and a compass but understand the value in getting lost along the way. To settle into the space of unknown and just be...to trust...that we'll not only find our way, but see sights far more grand and have experiences far more meaningful. For all of these reasons...I think it's safe to say Gina and I would be characters in her Caldwell Collection, Fall 16/17."

Rewind.

Burrito bowl=brain food. I had this idea. The idea was ready-to-travel, sophisticated yet functional, modern clothing designs with textiles sourced sustainably from around the globe. Fast forward a few months and — Voilà! — Gina launched the Vietnam Collection. So cool. My insanely creative fashion design-studying little sis Mikaela Youngblood met Gina with me in what we shall deem, "the night of the condoms" as well...and began to build a relationship with Gina. That relationship has now turned into an apprenticeship this summer and a trip to Vietnam to learn all about sourcing, her cut and sew operation, and more. We are threads woven into the fabric of life, creating a beautiful pattern of connection. Right??

A couple of weeks ago Gina called me, "Hey, what are you doing in a few days? Want to help me pitch my line for the the Independent Designer Runway Show to kick-off Fashion Week at The Bellevue Collection?" Um, yes. So to Seattle I went for a pseudo-weekend. Enter: Seattle, in 24 hours and enter: the Caldwell Collection.

It had been a while since I had pitched to a panel, but I channeled my agency days and did my best to make Gina proud. Gina was there, too. On my iPad in my clutch from India. I carried her in with me. Together with our beautiful model Nida and a few nerves, we shared the story of the Caldwell Collection. It was FUN.

Not only did Gina remind me how much I love to story tell about beautiful creations designed by the insanely talented people in my life, but she and the Caldwell Collection also reminded me of all of the things that make me uniquely me. Curiosity. Passion. Exploration. Thank you, Gina Marie, for stoking the creative fire within me and teaching me a lesson about the power of a vision and a team of passionate women. What a gift.

Take a LOOK BOOK:

And, finally...the poem that captivated me and has been swirling in my wanderlust mind since Seattle...

“Wynken, Blynken, and Nod one night
Sailed off in a wooden shoe,
Sailed on a river of crystal light
Into a sea of dew.
“Where are you going, and what do you wish?”
The old moon asked the three.
“We have come to fish for the herring-fish
That live in this beautiful sea;
Nets of silver and gold have we,”
Said Wynken,
Blynken,
And Nod.

The old moon laughed and sang a song,
As they rocked in the wooden shoe;
And the wind that sped them all night long
Ruffled the waves of dew;
The little stars were the herring-fish
That lived in the beautiful sea.
“Now cast your nets wherever you wish,
Never afraid are we!”
So cried the stars to the fishermen three,
Wynken,
Blynken,
And Nod.

All night long their nets they threw
To the stars in the twinkling foam,
Then down from the skies came the wooden shoe,
Bringing the fishermen home:
‘Twas all so pretty a sail, it seemed
As if it could not be;
And some folk thought ‘twas a dream they’d dreamed
Of sailing that beautiful sea;
But I shall name you the fishermen three:
Wynken,
Blynken,
And Nod.

Wynken and Blynken are two little eyes,
And Nod is a little head,
And the wooden shoe that sailed the skies
Is a wee one’s trundle-bed;
So shut your eyes while Mother sings
Of wonderful sights that be,
And you shall see the beautiful things
As you rock in the misty sea
Where the old shoe rocked the fishermen three:
Wynken,
Blynken,
And Nod.”

— Eugene Field

Moral of the story: never underestimate the impact of 1,000 condoms in your face...or the power of connection, a smile and a simple greeting. It could take you to Seattle via a serendipitous series of events.

Much love and gratitude,

Megan

YOU ARE HERE.

I sat down to start writing this with a little exercise. I took three deep breaths. Try it. Seriously, right now. Close your eyes, inhale deeply and exhale slowly and remind yourself where you are. You are right here. In this moment. And you have the power to decide if this moment is beautiful or it is fearful. B-R-E-A-T-H-E.

Okay, now let's talk about what happens when you stop breathing and you let yourself slide down the slippery slope of fear, anxiety and worry. There have been moments in my life where I've been so incredibly scared. So scared that my body responds in the form of sleepless nights or rejection of food. I remember the moment I realized that leaving my ex-husband was actually a reality. I was standing outside of Quang's in Minneapolis by this wall with panda graffiti on it. I got into my red Kia Soul and started driving back to my apartment. Suddenly I got sick to my stomach and had to pull over and vomit. I was terrified to make the decision. My body knew before my mind, and my mind was telling me it was time.

Fear is crippling. Anxiety is overwhelming. Worry ages you. But seriously. My mind never stops, which is a great problem to have when I'm at my best and it's full of ideas and possibility, open to what the Universe has to present me. The moments in my life where I've hit a wall and become so overwhelmed with life's challenges have been the moments in my life where I've been the least successful. When you carry that energy around with you, it presents itself in every single interaction. It's impeding. It affects your personal life, career, and how you approach any situation. Fear, anxiety and worry are suffocating. The challenge is finding perspective and seeing the bigger picture.

At the end of this season, I was a mess of emotions. I was exhausted. I was sad. I was fearful. I was angry. I was worried. Stress led to worry, which led to anxiety. I was constantly feeling like I was in the wrong place. Had FOMO to the extreme. I didn't protect myself and I was influenced by the voices of too many outsiders who had no idea what my reality was. I couldn't think clearly and I lost the essence of who I was at the core. To those on the outside, it might not have been entirely apparent. They probably thought it was just a long season and I needed a break. Certainly a break was necessary, but there was a lot more I needed too. The weight of heartbreak is crushing. I needed to entirely disconnect and focus on healing my soul. No better place than Maui for healing...soaking in that sun and feeling that 'Aloha spirit' to the core. Slowly, I'd be renewed and I'd feel like me again.

I boarded the plane in Salt Lake to Maui and I remember looking in the mirror and feeling about 10 years older. I didn't feel like saying "hi" or smiling at anyone in my path. Have you ever noticed what happens when you when you approach the world with negativity? The world dishes it right back at you. A direct reflection of what I felt inside...the world was a mirror. People like happy people. People want to surround themselves with positivity. I do, at least. On the flip side, misery loves company, but I don't want to surround myself with negativity. My energy was so off. Seriously, I felt so out of my element. And that feeling only led to me spiraling faster down the slippery slope of fear, anxiety and worry. I knew I didn't want to feel this way, so I resolved to take conscious steps forward. Here's how...

For once, I completely disconnected from my work. Might sound odd to some, but this is the first time EVER in my life where I've committed to disconnecting from my work. Fully. I didn't answer emails. I slept with my phone away from my bed. I never set an alarm except for the day I woke up to see sunrise at Haleakala. I started writing every morning and night. Morning meditation and evening reflection. I spoke only to people I wanted to speak with on my terms. If I felt worry, I stopped and breathed three times. I swam in the ocean. I moved daily. I surfed.

I spent time with friends who reminded me that fear, anxiety and worry will get you nowhere. Peter, the 72-year-old man at Stopwatch taught me a lesson over a bloody mary and peanuts: "Remember what you have." Another friend reminded me, "Why worry...the outcome is going to be the same whether or not you worry anyway." I knew that, but the reminder was what I needed at that moment. Whether or not you believe in God or a god or whatever...this is the truth. I had to remind myself that whatever the outcome, I'd be okay. Because I've been here before and I know this to be the truth.

It's not easy to shed the shit. It takes work. And, more importantly, it takes being gentle with yourself and reminding yourself what Brené Brown has said, "I'm doing the best I can with the tools I have." The best you can do depends on so many variables, but keeping this thought in mind helps me to be more gentle with myself and more empathetic with others at the same time. Through writing, I was reminded of when things have been really uncertain in my life and how beautifully it always works out when I replace fear with trust and anxiety and worry with hope.

REWIND. Two years ago when I moved to Utah, I had nothing. No job, no car, no insurance, no relationship, no money, no home. I was scared. I wondered if I'd ever meet anyone again, let alone commit to one person. I wondered if I'd find a career that I'd love as much as I loved Ethnotek. I wondered if I'd find a place to live that I could afford. But I had one thing on my side that was stronger than fear. Hope. This job fell into my lap in the most serendipitous way...but it was because I had taken conscious steps to getting there. Through amazing connections, I found a good, safe home. I bought a car. I fell in love with my work and met the best humans in the world on mountains across the globe. I fell in love with someone who taught me great lessons I needed to learn. And slowly slowly, when I set intentions and moved forward, everything started to lift. It always works out, it just may look a little different than you had planned.

FAST FORWARD. Now I find myself homeless once again. On the verge of being seasonally jobless. Alone...but happy to be alone right now to focus on me. A good friend/advisor recently asked me, 'Megan, what is your heart's desire?' He reminded me that I was exactly where I needed to be in order to find the depth of silence within myself as I worked through the process. That's the truth. I'm finding it.

Here I am. Right now. Breathing. Healthy. Writing. Smiling. Trusting. Free of expectation, fear, anxiety, worry. It's a healthier, lighter, happier place to be. It's a place where anything is possible. And I've found my way again - ready to rely on my intuition. It's a clean slate to create and dream. It's not scary. It's beautiful.

You are here. So just breathe.

Megan